How to be the better nanny :)

I am a nanny, a babysitter and a playmate to my two-year-old nephew, Gepher. I do housekeeping for him too. Most of my days spent would be running after him or calling his name thinking where could he be playing---good thing we have a small house.

My sister's usual schedule is wake up at around six in the morning and leaves an hour after that. When she's out of the door telling Gepher to do a goodbye "flying kiss", I'm already left in charge. She comes back after working hours and finds the house a total mess. I only have the time to fix things and put everything back to its proper places when Gepher is asleep. Now, that's another problem. When his babysitter earlier left a few weeks back, I could still manage my time to work and meet my deadline. But this time, my nephew is awake more than 12 hours a day. No noon breaks, no afternoon naps.





So, I made an unofficial tentative schedule of how to spend quality time with my nephew with the sole purpose of draining his energy so he can sleep early. ;p

By seven in the morning after breakfast my nephew usually get his toys and play with them so I had the time to wash the dishes, sweep the floor and fix the beds. Hmmm...a Cinderella story perhaps? no fairy godmother popping out yet, no grand ball to attend to. I do have two sisters, no not step sisters, but I'm not sure if they're really good but I can't call them evil either. ;p and umm...rats aren't my best friends :c

At eight, we would be watching a movie. Make that a two-hour movie of his choice. By that time, I can start composing my article. In between the movie, I would be making his milk feed. Before, he normally goes to sleep when the movie's done. But this time, he gets bored and goes to my room and well, that's how the tragedy starts. First, taking each and every thing on my shelf rack studying every part of my earrings and pins. A second after that, I can already find him climbing fast right up my window. I have to keep an eye on him all the time.

So, the morning nap is replaced with coloring time. I would play the nursery rhymes while he's coloring his activity book. He loves listening to the tunes and Barney songs. One of my best friends, Nat, also told me kids learn easier and faster when music is played while they're doing activities. After a few hours, lunch would be served.

Now that's he's refueled, he plays again. Sometimes, we walk to the subdivision park and watch basketball games. Sadly, the park doesn't have a play area for kids so we only play for about an hour.

In the afternoon, I set aside time for him to learn his ABC's and numbers. And I play a video along with our learning time with Winnie the Pooh's 123--a Walt Disney home video and also the video Nat gave him, Baby Einstein videos.

After our learning period, it's usually five or six almost time for dinner. But I can say that's a wrap, because my sister is usually home to take care of him for the rest of the evening.

One thing, I've learned about taking care of my nephew is how to be more patient even if everything is a mess. I'm also doing this because I made a promise to my sister when she earlier gave birth to our first nephew. I promised her I would take care of Gepher no matter what it takes just like I promised our mother before she died, that I would finish college with or without money. I know I have been unfair to myself, blocking every opportunity that comes along, closing my doors to the world. People tell me to go somewhere up top. I should be doing what I love to do earning more money than anyone else. I should be going out on a vacation traveling to places I have never been. I guess most of them are right. But one thing I've learned when my mother passed away, money can never really buy you everything you need or want, it's your will power that does it for you. But your time with your loved ones only comes once even if there's always tomorrow ahead of you. Sometimes, people don't understand me. I don't even understand myself why I'm making this a principle. I used to be a very ambitious person who knows what I want and when can I get it. I don't know, when my mother passed away, it's like everything changed in me. I still know I can have the things I want when the time comes. Hehehe... But I'm just taking my time to re-evaluate myself and my plans.

I will take care of my nephew as he grows, and does he grow up really fast. He'll be in school and I would say I can start all over again, you know, the typical things like what most people do, catching up dreams even if they're awake. ;p

At the Middle of it

"What do single women of 25 do?," Maurine, my college friend, asked me when we had a chat last night. I paused for a while and realized my mind was blank. I didn't have an answer. I merely sighed and told her I didn't know really.

So, I started looking at my friends' pages at social networking sites especially Friendster. Most of my friends who were likely my age got married earlier than 25. Even some of them now have two kids of their own.

First of all, I am clueless! and maybe so did Maurine. Sure, Maurine and me have our own significant someones but in a few months, I'm not sure yet if there will be wedding bells ringing for us.

I've already thought about doing many important things when I reach this age. (It sounds unfair that after seven days of celebrating the new year, my birthday also pops out as another event.) Plans like travel, have a gift for myself and maybe a mortgage on a house and lot have been on my list. And now, it's September, I feel as if I have not bought something really good for myself. Where did all my money go?

In many countries, especially in the US, social independence is often practice among women. Perhaps about half of the population is likely composed of single women.

In contrast, considering the cultural differences here in the Philippines, where the family practice interdependence, only few of the single women really had the chance to do what they want to do. Mostly, single women here would try to help the family as long as they can especially on financial obligations. This kind of help would go on until it becomes a pressure, a responsibility. First, you would help in paying the bills, and then the next you realize you would also be paying for your younger brother's tuition fees and then you would be giving him his day-to-day allowances. Then one day, you'll find yourself broke. A typical situation, I guess. So savings are likely to be postponed most of the time.

I, for instance, have this simple yet complicated situation in my family of three. We have no parents, just us three sisters helping each other to implement the word "survival" everyday. Maurine, on the other hand, has her own unexplainable situation in her family too. We were two of the single women who also didn't get the chance of going out to parties or events with some friends (Friends have gotten busier these days or maybe we just chose to rather stay at home...)

But this should not be discouraging me on getting what I want. Maybe at this stage, I'm just caught in between the moment of wanting to break free and meeting the deadline of up-to-5o-only lifespan. Of course, celebrating another year after 50 is what people say "life begins". There are lots of options really, I only need a little more time to know what I want to do or become at least five years after. For now, I just want to enjoy what life may bring me.

All I need is time management, a very flexible savings method and a definite plan--with or without marriage. :)

That's what I should tell Maurine. ;p

love and friendship shared with one same person---a fair trial

Borgie...he's the Man. He's usually the guy who friends run to especially when problems come their way. Friends approach him for advices, maybe borrow money or just spend the evening together as drinking buddies. He's everybody's friend. He usually listen to problems thrown at him but his friends never really listen to his advices, or maybe they're just extreme cases.

I personally got the chance of knowing Borgie during college days. I remember he was one of the few (or more) people who witnessed my vulnerability when I would be dating guys who ended up telling me I was not for them---no kidding ... :(

"Pie, I would be making a study about you and every guy that you've dated or would be dating so I would know what went wrong and tell you what part of you that you need to improve," these were Borgie's words telling me that there really was nothing wrong with me and that I only need a break from dating.

I can only pause for a while and smile of how time flies fast. ;p

He's got his weakness too. I also witnessed how he managed to stay with the girl he really liked even when that girl already had someone she loved. That girl also happened to be in our circle of friends. Small, small world.

That was Borgie's weakness, I believe. He easily falls in love with a girl who's sweet to him.

I've always thought of Borgie as a good friend. But then one day, I realized I was calling him up and he was calling me so we can watch movies together. For a while, I was thinking maybe people were getting busy so he didn't have anyone to call and besides, watching movie alone is a very lonely situation. I can still take the loneliness of eating alone at a restaurant, but watching a movie all by myself? It's very sad.

But then I started putting one hand over his shoulder and from time to time, also putting my right arm to his left arm. It was a bit of embarrassing. But it was okay. Few of his friends also mentioned he was serious about me. But we never really talked about it. So, I thought he was not into relationships.

I had a chat with him about two weeks ago after he was away for a couple of days when he went to another city for a vacation. We had the chance to open up on our dating part. He told me he was not sure if I really liked him too. The next time we met, he became my boyfriend, weird. This is way beyond platonic.

I was not really closing my doors to having a relationship with a friend. But I'm worried what would happen if one day Borgie and me will break up, have our own separate ways. We would also be losing our friendship one day. And it would be an awkward feeling telling each other, one day our roads will meet when we do meet almost everyday because we're in the same circle of friends. I'm the type of girl who doesn't ever want to meet an ex-beau along the way.

I have read in Joshua Harris' I Kissed Dating Goodbye book that says friends don't want to go into a relationship because they don't want to ruin the friendship. From what I've understood, the book also tells the readers that it's actually better to be in a relationship with a friend because a friend is one person who knows you from head to toes.

Although Borgie and me have been friends since college, there are still lots of things about him that I don't know of. So, I told him I would like to know him better as I'll keep loving him. I also told him if he'll still be my boyfriend after one month, I'll give him a gift. But I'm not so sure when was the exact date that we became lovers from friends. He told me he doesn't really celebrate monthsaries, but I said "We had to" because, my romantic relationship with a guy never last to a year, unless if it's a long-distance love affair.

So, here goes, I'll be counting days to our monthsary, probably the third week of September. For now, I'm still comfortable of calling him Borgie and telling him my everyday problems that keep adding up and asking for advices. But this time, I'll be complaining to my friend and boyfriend. ehem ;p

We've been going out and talking a lot about life but I've never noticed what he's been eating or what colors of shirts he's been wearing. I asked him when we were taking a snack at McDonald's "Borg, what's your favorite food?"

"Spaghetti," Borgie replied.